poverty bites

seems kinda obvious but i've been living it for the last half a year so i feel like i can testify. i'm just coming out of it, cash flow is once again flowing but i still wake up in the morning and notice if that knot of tension is or isn't there.

do you know the knot i'm talkin about? it's the one that's waiting for someone to knock on your door so they can turn off your gas and it's only 15 degrees outside. it's the knot the tightens every time the phone rings, cause someone's hunting you down for money. it's that damn squeeze when your kid wants to buy something any kids entitled to and you have to say no and hesitate to tell the real "ain't got no money in my pocket" reason.

i got to a point in my life where i really placed a lot of faith in the goddess. i'd let go of my fear and trust that somehow i'd get what i needed. little miracles kept happening. little intakes of cash and currancy. until one day my neighbor asked if i would tutor her child and there it was! a way to continue to homeschool my daughter and earn a living.

such gentle grace. the goddess. she's good.